Sweet Misery
by babyhilts
Summary: CHAPTER 11 UP! PLZ REVIEW! Doe isn't open, or very emotional. She's tough, and believes there is nothing more important than her reputation.Somewhere down the line Doe is going to break and she knows it. Summary ain't great but the story's good.
1. Shepard's Rain

_This is before any of the book happened and I don't think the events of the book will be taking place in this fic. Sorry. So, that means….JOHNNY AND DALLY ARE ALIVE. Can't have those guys dead. It would just be too depressing._

_Disclaimer: Okay, well i think we all know i don't own the Outsiders because if i did i wouldn't be here. Right? So, pleasedon't sue(dont think thats how its spelt lol). O well you no wut i mean._

_Rating: Pg-13 because there will be swearing and violence. I mean its the outsiders. _

_Author's Note: First fanfic so be nice :(. I dont mind constructive critisism but if you start flamin me ill pelt you with timbits. If you don't no what that is flame me and you'll find out.(but please don't). Don't know where this story is going yet, so bare with me and if you like it review PLEASE!!!R&R :D Oh, and don't mind the typos and grammar and stuff im bad. If you spot it, i'll fix it. K on with the story. _

**Sweet Misery**

**Chapter 1:**

Rain leaked down from the bruised sky above, sharp thick drops stinging me as they hit my open skin. I pulled my patched up jean jacket closer to my chest. The buttons had broken off years ago and although the coat was almost too small for me and a bit uncomfortable at times, it kept me warm. My fingers dug into the material, holding it closed as tightly as they could. I'd been outside since the beginning of the storm and by now the rain had gone through my old jacket and had even soaked my white dress underneath. The two straps that kept the dress up hung off the edge of my shoulders awkwardly. I was shivering and the strength in me was depleting with ever second I stayed outside and every step I took. Although I wore a pair of torn jeans underneath the short dress, I was still cold and I figured I'd die of pneumonia before I even made it to the park.

Up in the distance I could make out the blur of a street light. I sighed, knowing that I would be free from the ebony mists, even if it was only for a moment. I was a tough girl; you had to be in my neighborhood. If you weren't tough where I lived than you were as good as dead. Everyday someone got jumped and I'd been jumped more than a dozen times, but I've learned from my mistakes. Course, it never mattered how tough I was or how tough a front I tried to put on, I could never really stand the darkness for too long. People that knew me knew I hated to be alone in the black, unaware of what was out there. Being alone and being kept in the dark, unable to see anything, that's what scared me. So, you could imagine the relief I felt when I saw that lamp.

My foot landed hard as I came to a sudden halt and water splashed upwards from a puddle below staining my pants a murky brown. A smiled curled on my face as the pool of light engulfed my frigid form. I felt safe, even if I wasn't. Further down the road, with one headlight out, a brown ford pickup inched its way towards me. A lump rose in my throat, I'd recognize that shitty excuse for a vehicle anywhere. I hooked one hand in my jean pocket and grabbed for my blade with the other. The one headlight that worked clicked off when the truck was just twenty feet away and then when it was only seven feet the Ford just stopped completely. Adrenaline pulsated through my body, circulating quicker than my blood and seeping from every pore. I waited anxiously for the two shadowy figures getting out of the truck to step closer.

"Where is he Mackenzie?" A brutal voice yelled out my last name and although the face was still hidden in the dark, I knew who it was.

"What no hello, how are you?" I replied coolly, my voice just a bit higher than the never ending beating of the rain against the asphalt. I could just picture the nasty look on his face.

"Come on Shepard; don't start forgetting those manners I taught you."

"You watch your tongue" another voice cried out. Curly Shepard took a step forward into the light and I smiled. He was all mouth and I hated him for that. It was good to have him fighting for you and he did fight pretty damn good but he rarely backed up anything he said.

"Where's Dallas?" Tim repeated the anger clearly evident in his voice.

"How the hell should I know? Do I look like his mother Shepard?"

"He slashed my tires twice this week! Now where is he?"

"Fuck you."

"What?"

"I know you heard me so I won't bother repeating myself."

I knew Dally had slashed his tires and it was stupid of him to do so, but on the other hand it was funny as hell. Course, I was the one who had to put up with Tim and lil Curly Shepard. I turned to leave, not bothering to be hassled by them anymore when something latched onto my right shoulder. My body tensed out of surprise then immediately relaxed when I recognized Curly's cheap cologne.

"Shepard, get your greasy hand off my shoulder before I rip it off and beat you with it."

Instead of listening, -which he should have done- he spun me round to face him. The kid was a foot shorter than me, not very intimidating. Tim, on the other hand intimidated the hell out of me. I'd never let ol' Shepard know that though. He was still hiding in the shadows, but I knew he was watching and waiting for his moment to strike.

"He asked you a question bitch! Now answer him!"

I wasn't going to stand out here all night and argue with the Shepard's. I was sick of yelling and I was too tired and weak to fight, that's why I'd left my house in the first place, to get away from all that bullshit.

With a sharp pull backwards, I wrenched myself out of Curly's grasp. His face lit up with surprise as the heel of my boot came up to meet him in the chin. The force knocked him backwards, his feet trying to steadying themselves before they eventually slipped, leaving Curly to sit with his ass in a muddy puddle. I smirked proud of myself, but the smirk didn't last long. Curly jumped back up, feet now steadier than ever and his pride probably a shaken up. He was mad. You could see the flames in his eyes just grow with every intake of breath.

I couldn't help but taunt him. "Want more?"

He cursed me out. Hands formed into two tight fists, he leapt towards me. I went to step to the side, but I was a second too late. I really hadn't expected him to go all out like that and so as I was moving, his grubby fingers wrapped around my knees and pulled me to the cement. My naked arms scrapped away and rocks and shards of glass from old bottles quickly found their way into my skin. I cringed, not wanting to look down. A foot behind me, I could feel Curly's hand on my ass. I trembled slightly, his hands were so cold and the touch of them made me sick to my stomach.

I formed a fist with my left hand and brought it down hard against his skull. He went limp almost immediately but I knew he wouldn't stay that way for long. With a quick shove, I let his heavy body roll onto the wet ground, leaving it there to soak in more rain and mud.

Tim was already looming over me and by the time I went to stand up I'd just realized that. He didn't say anything to me, just stood there. I took him in for the first time, just like I'd done many times before. He was a big guy, with a good build and huge arms. His arms weren't quite as large as Darrel Curtis', but they were big enough to do some damage. I wanted to say something, but I couldn't find anything and I really didn't think I needed to explain anything, I mean he'd been there. He'd seen what had happened.

"Tell Dallas if I catch him slashing my tires again, I'll do worse next time."

And before I could even get out a 'What the hell' Shepard had belted me square in the cheek. My feet lost touch with the ground and then my whole body was falling against it. I reached a shaky hand to the right side of my face but before it had touched the skin something rammed itself into my back. Once, twice, three, four times I felt the front of Tim's shoe dig into my back. I needed to get up again, I needed to defend myself but I was too tired. I rolled over in the mud onto my side just as Tim's foot found it's way into my ribs. There was this harsh cracking sound and I screamed bloody murder before I felt myself falling into darkness.

I'm not sure how long I stayed that way for, but I know I wasn't unconscious. I wish I had been though. The pain was overwhelming and I couldn't remember the last time I'd had the shit kicked out of me that bad. Even if it was a few kicks, it had been Shepard who delivered them. I listened alone again in the ebony. Feet hit the pavement as two voices above slowly began to fade away with every step. I figured it was the Shepard's high tailing it outta there; the bastards, leaving me out in the street. When I got a hold of them I was going to make them pay. Right then though, I was more worried about escaping the dark than anything. I hated to be left alone in it, but the rain that kept falling seemed to sooth me and it made the situation I was in seem a bit better.

Eventually the darkness turned into light and once again I was underneath the street lamp. There was a small dark reddish brown puddle next to my head, which I quickly realized was from me. My lip was sore and I could taste the familiar bitterness of blood. Great, Tim probably gave me a split lip or something. I groaned and complained to myself for about five minutes, before I'd finally pulled myself back on my feet.

I was cold, wet, sore and bleeding and I had no clue where to go. I knew where to go, it was simple I had to go home. But being home didn't comfort me anymore than being alone or trapped in darkness did. There would be only one other place I could go where I would be safe and I didn't feel like going there either, but it was my only option.

After ten minutes of stumbling around, I found myself quietly shutting the Curtis' back door. They always left it open for the gang or other people that couldn't bring themselves to go home. I tiptoed through the kitchen, heavy leather cowboy boots in hand, because I didn't feel the guys would like waking up to foot prints all over their floor. The house was dead silent and utterly dark. I wanted to clean myself off because I knew the cuts were going to get infected if I didn't tend to them quickly enough but I couldn't bear waking the brothers. They did enough for everyone.

I leaned down, ready to fall onto the couch when I saw a lump rise up and down, and heard the familiar rhythmic sound of relaxed breathing. I moved closer towards the front of the couch and caught sight of Johnny's dark face. Greasy bangs shaded his eyes but I knew it was him. He looked so sweet laying there, all quiet, not worrying about how his parents beat him for no good reason. I couldn't take the couch. Instead, I tucked the wool blanket that Mrs. Curtis' had knit underneath him and then went to sit in Darry's armchair. I knew he'd hate to find me in there but I was just so damn tired and their wooden floor didn't look like it would warm me up much. Dropping the boots in front of the chair, I dragged my legs onto the soft cushion and curled into a tight ball. After a bit of daydreaming and a few unimportant thoughts that usually came to mind when I went to bed, I finally found myself drifting off to sleep.


	2. bruised ribs and blonde hair

****

**Chapter 2:**

The sound of a plastic bag rustling was the first thing I heard while returning to the land of living. This sound was soon followed by the all too familiar hollers and shouts that only a group of reckless teenage boys can make. They moved around the house, banging into things here and there, making more noise than I could stand. The pain from the night before still lingered quite heavily in and around my body and now I was getting a headache to go with it.

I was guessing no one had noticed me yet and I hoped it would be another hour until they did. I should have known better. Less than three minutes later I felt something bony and heavy land on top of me. I cursed and let out a small umph at the added weight but I didn't bother to struggle, the person on me was doing enough of that. They stirred; moving around fast and digging their elbows and knees into my already tender body. By the time the person had finally pulled themselves off of me I was in worse shape than before.

"What the hell?" I heard a voice mumble beside my head. My eyes fluttered and then opened, two small green orbs taking in the sight around them. A tall guy with rusty colored sideburns was staring down at me.

"Mornin' Two-bit" I smiled. He returned the smile and took a step back.

"Glory Mac, I thought you were some stray Sodapop had let in last night. All curled up with your hair all o'er the place like that."

"Awe, thanks for makin a girl feel pretty" I replied sarcastically while stretching. I looked into the Kitchen to where Ponyboy and Johnny were quietly nibbling on their eggs and toast. Darry was a few feet away cooking the rest of the gang's breakfast, while Steve was shouting with his head in the icebox for Soda to get ready. I wondered where Dallas was, probably hiding out at Buck's.

"No problem kid. So what were you doing on the chair?" I shook my head and began to get to my feet.

"Who was in my chair?" I heard Darry yell.

"Thanks Matthews." Two-bit just shrugged and stepped into the kitchen leaving me to deal with Darry.

"I was in your chair Curtis" I yelled back in just the same tone. Darry turned from his fried eggs and for the first time took me in. He flashed me a warning glare before smiling. "What?" I snapped playfully.

"Don't let it happen again. I don't want you getting it all wet."

I looked back down at the chair. It did seem a bit damp and there was a small pool of water that had formed underneath my boots. Shit, I didn't need this.

"I'll clean it up Curtis. Jeez, don't get your panties in a bunch or nothing."

I moved through the kitchen, ignoring the worried looks on Pony and Johnny's faces and stepped into the bathroom. Steve was leaning in the doorway, waiting for his better half to finish his shower. I grabbed a towel from one of the drawers and headed back out, giving Steve a questioning look as I did.

"What are ya looking at me like that for?" he asked.

"Jeez, the way you cling to Sodapop you'd think you guys were going out or something." Steve narrowed his eyes and turned away. I guess Two-bit had heard the remark because he was laughing his ass off and had already begun to add to it. I punched Steve's arm gently and smiled.

I hadn't taken more than a single step when I felt my head start to swim and the scene in front of me tilt. I reached out, hoping to grab onto something but there was nothing. Something shot up through my lower back, lighting a trail of pain all the way up to my shoulders and everything got really dizzy. I heard Two-bit still laughing as everything got worse. Pony and Johnny were still eating and Steve was now talking to someone, it must have been Soda because I couldn't hear the shower. I tried to speak, to warn them or something, I don't know, to say anything at all I guess. But nothing but a short squeak came out as I felt my body finally plummeting to the hard linoleum floor.

Two-bit whispered "Mac?" He must have been standing right above me now. A few heavy foot steps echoed through the room as they hit the floor, the sound ringing in my ears and making the dull pain in my head hurt more. A rough callused hand touched the side of my face, slowly making its way to my forehead.

"Is she okay?" I heard Ponyboy ask.

"Does she look okay?" Steve snapped back. I hated when he was mean to Pony. I always told Steve off when he did that but I couldn't even bring myself to tell him to shut up.

"Doe, open your eyes?" Soda begged. He sounded worried so I listened. With the bit of strength I could muster, I raised them. His flawless face and tuff looking hair stared back at me, his trade mark grin spreading across his face. "That's a girl."

Soda didn't stay in my line of sight for too long. Darry was there, pushing his younger brother away and reaching out for my hand. I took it, a little reluctant at first. He was rougher than Soda was and I hated to admit it but I wanted Soda there helping me up instead of him. I laced my fingers in Darry's, and let him start to lift me.

"I think you should rest on the couch" Darry commanded more than suggested. I shook my head.

"I'm fine Curtis. Just need to walk it off…" I felt my side pain as I tried to regain my footing. There was another cracking sound just like the one from last night but it was a bit quieter than the other one had been. I grimaced, stumbling backwards from the sudden pain and ending up in Two-bit's open arms. He was warm and soft and although he reeked of booze, I was happy to be near him.

"Mac?" I shivered, feeling cold all of a sudden. "You're shaking kid."

"I'm fine." I snapped.

"Why don't you sit down?" Soda suggested. "You look beat."

"No."

"Mackenzie sit down before I kick your head in" I heard Darry threaten. I looked up into his hard eyes and realized he wasn't joking. He wouldn't kick my head in but he'd probably add to my pain. I muttered a curse and let Two-bit help me to the couch.

"I'm sitting. See? This is me sitting" I told him angrily, gesturing with my arms. "Now, this is me standing and leaving." I got on my feet and stepped away from the couch.

"Ah, no you don't Mac" Two-bit called after me as his hands gripped my sides. He tugged me back hard and I grimaced, clenching my teeth in spite of the pain. I sunk back, landing roughly on the couch. Sweat broke out on my face, slithering down like thin translucent serpents. I moaned quietly and shut my eyes leaning further into the soft cushions.

"Thanks a lot Matthews."

"Doe lie down." Darry's hands gently lowered me onto the couch, so that I was laying length wise. He moved his fingers across my front torso, inching up the front of my white torn dress. I was glad now that I had worn jeans underneath, course, I always wore jeans. When I knew that everything below my chest was showing, I opened my eyes. His hands were poking at my ribs careful not to hurt them anymore. I tried not to look anyone directly in the eyes, because I knew they'd start to fuss over me and I didn't want that. It was too late though. Somehow I had managed to lock eyes with Darry, and once that happens you can't unlock them unless he's the one to pull away first.

"Wanna tell me about it?"

"Shepard's" I hissed when his fingers prodded too roughly. His eyes widened.

"Tim did this to you?" Steve growled. I couldn't see him but I knew he'd been the one to say it.

"Yeah, Curly scrapped my arms up a bit. Nothin much, you know that punk can't fight worth a damn. Tim did most of it."

"What for?" Soda asked.

"Don't know, because he's an asshole."

"Sure it didn't have anything to do with Dally slashin Tim's tires" Steve said.

"Oh, yeah. That's what it was." I shut my eyes once again, realizing how tired I was getting.

"Why didn't you wake one of us?" Darry asked.

I opened my eyes one last time "I don't need no protector Darry." He sighed and moved into the kitchen again. After a few minutes of more talking and answering questions the rest of them left too. Everyone except for Two-bit, he sat himself down right beside me. I had shut my eyes again but his smell gave him away. It wasn't very pleasant but he was the only one I knew that smelt like that.

"What is it Two-bit. I'm kinda tired."

"Nothin, just watchin ya sleep."

"You're one strange hood, you know that?" I laughed and reached for his hand. After a minute of searching I caught it and pulled into onto my stomach, holding it tight as I dozed off.

The house was unusually quiet when I got up next. My dress was still raised but now instead of my light purple bruises there were bandages. It must have been Steve; he was the only one besides Darry or Dally who could bandage a person up half decently. I pulled my dress back down and put my boots back on before leaving the empty Curtis house.

It was about mid afternoon when I ran into the boys again. Two-bit, Pony, Dally, and Johnny were having a game of football in the lot. I pulled out a smoke, a habit I have of doing whenever I'm real tense or worried, or if I just want to look tough. It's almost the same as Sodapop's smoking habits, except I must get stressed out a lot cause I smoke more than him. I took a quick drag and shuffled hurriedly to the lot.

Two-bit was doing a victory dance, with Pony's head under his arm, face pressed right into his pits. I felt sick, knowing that the smell couldn't have been any better than B.O. and gym socks. Maybe if Pony was lucky Matthews had put some deodorant on that day, but judging by the loss of color in the kids face I doubt he had.

"Two-bit you crazy son of a bitch" I yelled. Dally and Johnny stopped horsing around long enough to acknowledge me. I pulled Pony out from under Two-bit's sweaty arm and let him take in a few fresh breaths of air. "You could have suffocated the kid. Well, no wait. The smell woulda killed him off way before the suffocation." I looked back at Pony. "Think you'll live?" I asked in mock fear. He nodded.

"I'll manage." He gave off a fake cough and together him and Johnny both laughed. I smiled to myself.

"So, what was the big idea about leaving me all alone back there huh?" I yelled at Two-bit.

"I didn't think you would wanna play football." He replied. "I mean you are a girl and you never were any good before" he teased. "and I doubt you'd be much better with those banged up ribs."

I glared at him. "Matthews, you dirty…" I was ready to call him every foul word I knew when Dally spoke up, voice harsh and cold.

"What's wrong with your ribs?"

"Just got a little bruised that's all" I said quickly. I really didn't want him to know it had been his fault, although it hadn't. Just it was in a way because if he hadn't slashed the tires, than Tim wouldn't have taken it out on me and…

"Was it your ol man again."

"Yeah." I didn't bother looking at Two-bit because I knew he was mad.

"Doe, don't lie." He shoved past me. "it was the Shepards." That's all that had to be said. Dallas' hand was already on my wrist and he was dragging me down the street, when he shouted back to the others to mind their own business and not to follow.


	3. Yelling Greasers

_Author's Note: Short Chappie i no but i didn't want to put it with chap 2. Too lazy i guess. READ THO :D TEll me what you think so far. I don't know their might be some romance later on but i dont want it going crazy :P_

**Chapter 3:**

"Dallas…" I began but he shot me one of his dangerous looks that said don't mess with me or I'll take you out. I didn't care though, I wasn't afraid of him, or the Shepard's. I wasn't a helpless little girl even if he wanted to pretend I was, I could handle myself. "Dallas listen…"

"Shut it Doe." I bit my lip and felt a slight bit of pain. Not physical, just sorta emotional. I hated the way he had said that, like I didn't matter to him. We were friends but still, he could have at least been a bit nicer, I mean I had taken a beating for his ass.

Dallas finally stopped just a few houses down from the Park. I looked around, nobody was outside. He stood me in front of him and began to eye me up and down. I knew he had caught sight of the bruise on my cheek and the scraps on my arms but that was it, everything else was hidden, thank goodness.

"Lift your dress" he said roughly. I shook my head. His jaw tightened as he repeated himself. "I said lift it."

I swore, calling Dally a few special names as my thin fingers pulled the front of the white material back, revealing my stomach. He shook his head.

"What now?" I snapped.

"Take those off."

"Take what off, my pants?" I asked sarcastically.

"You know what. The bandages smart ass."

"Holy shit, Winston, I just had those put on."

"Well, I'll put some new ones on. Now take em off!"

"Fine!" I wrenched the white cotton back and threw it to the ground. "There! Happy!" I stared him in the eyes, hopping to tick him off or something but he wasn't paying attention, he was looking at my ribs. There were half circle bruises all over them from where Tim's shoe had hit me.

"Let's go" Dallas said quietly, taking my hand and leading me back to the lot. I lowered my dress and let myself be dragged once again down the road. We didn't bother saying a word to each other the entire way.

Pony, Johnny and Two-bit were still standing around the lot, tossing the football around tiredly, not putting much effort into it anymore. Dally's grip grew stronger when we walked past them. I searched with pleading eyes off in their direction, hoping that one of them would have the balls to come and tell Dally off.

"Hey, Dallas!" Two-bit was coming to my rescue.

"Bout damn time" I muttered. I saw Dally shake his head at Two-bit and then flip him off before quickening his pace.

We'd been speed walking for almost ten minutes when I finally pulled my wrist free. Dallas stopped, with his back to me.

"What's your problem Winston?" I screamed. "You better have one, I mean after all the dragging around…"

"Settle down Doe." I was surprised at how calm Dally was. You'd think after me yelling at him he'd yell back but no, he was just completely mellow. He pulled out a cigarette from behind his ear and lit it before taking a long drag. I waited impatiently, watching him with anger in my eyes.

"Dallas!" I broke the silence. The cancer stick dangled from his bottom lip, almost as it was taunting me. I hated being taunted. I snatched it from the chapped lips and threw it a few feet behind me, not even bothering to catch the evil glare Dally was most shooting in my direction. "Why are you treating me like this?"

"Like what?"

"Shit, I give up" I waved my pale arms in the air dramatically. "Come look me up when you've come to your senses."

I turned on my heel and stomped off down Sutton, leaving Dally alone without a cigarette.

"Greasy bastard" I muttered.


	4. Angel Rum

_Athour's Note: I wrote this really early in the morning about four a.m. to be exact so any typos or errors please forgive me. I was tired and I just needed to type a whole bunch. Enjoy_

Chapter 4:

It was going on nine p.m. when I eventually stepped onto my front porch. The ol' man's car wasn't parked in the driveway, which I assumed meant he wasn't home. Sometimes he'd leave it and walk five or six blocks drunker than a skunk and the next day have to go out looking for it. Only my dad could forget where he placed his car.

The metal key slipped into the locked with a smooth clicking sound before I let myself in. Darkness attacked my battered body. Although in the black I couldn't see more than a foot in front of my face, I knew that the living room and every other room for that matter was probably littered with beer bottles. The hard wood of the coffee tables could no longer be seen because of cigarette ashes that had never been cleaned off and there wasn't even a floor anymore.

Carpets had been stained and ripped, chairs were covered with cigarette holes from the many a times my ol'man had fallen asleep with a cancer stick in his mouth. He'd nearly burned our house down, with me in it for that matter. That was the main reason the living room smelt as bad as it did. Not just from all the tobacco and alcohol but also from the chard wood and melted plastic. I never could get that smell out of the house. It had burned six months ago, yet every time you stepped inside the room still smelt as bad as the first time it had caught fire.

Upstairs, my room lay quiet and untouched. I'd made my bed a week ago Monday and since then hadn't slept in it once. I rarely came home and when I did it was only to grab a change of clothes or to sleep there. About two or three times a week did I ever go home at all. The reason for this was my ol' man who I mentioned earlier and who I couldn't stand. My mother had died when I was just eight but during those eight years I'd witnessed a lot. Beatings, both verbal and physical and enough tears to fill the Nile. I haven't cried since I was eight. When I was little I would hide away in the crawl space of our house, because mom and dad never knew we had one and the yelling started that was where I'd stay. One night in September a few days after school had started my mom went out to the grocery store to pick up some potatoes and milk. That was the last night I ever saw her. I knew she loved me, but she must have wanted her freedom more. After that I only cried a few times. I've learnt to be tough, it was hard but hanging around seven guys helped a lot.

I shook the thoughts of old memories from my head and went to pack enough stuff to last me a few nights. A dusty ruby red suitcase began to fill with clothes, a brush, two pairs of shoes and other items as the night went on. By nine thirty I'd packed my belongings and changed from a ratty dress and coat into some cutoff jean shorts and a white blouse that tied up just above the stomach. I coated my lips with a bit of pale pink lip gloss and gave my eyelashes a few combs with some mascara. There was a party at Buck's for ten so I wanted to jazz my image up a bit.

I spun around in front of my bathroom mirror, acting like a twelve year old girl again, going on her first date. This didn't last long though. The smile curled on my lips, the giddiness I'd let out I quickly tucked back inside of me. Red curls fell in front of my face awkwardly until I put them into two messy braids. It still looked nice, just not as nice as I Soc would have them.

"Awe Socials" I laughed to myself. "Can't live with them, can't live without…wait what am I saying. Of course I could live without them."

My pace quickened when I left my house and started for Buck's. The air was cold; blowing bits of gravel at my bare legs yet it was still hot as hell out. It never mattered hot hard the wind blew sometimes it still seemed that you could fry an egg on the cracked cement.

"Doe Mackenzie, the hell are you doing around these parts?" I saw a stumbling Sodapop make his way towards me, Steve slipping and sliding not too far behind him. I swear they must have been separated at birth.

"Yeah" Steve slurred. "Shouldn't you be on the East side with all the other Soc's?"

"I'll show you Soc Steve Randle. You call me that one more time I'll carve the word all over that greasy body of yours" and just too prove I wasn't joking, I pulled out my blade from my shorts pocket. It was almost identical to Two-bits, except I hadn't lifted it. He'd lifted it for me when I'd been eleven and I'd gotten jumped real bad. Mac was carved on the side of the black handle.

"You know you wouldn't hurt us lil greaser, right?" Sodapop put on his charm, the one that made the girls faint but when he was that drunk he could never quite pull it off.

"Does Darry know your wondering around at all hours completely wasted?" I asked him, with only a hint of concern. It was of course a school night and even if he didn't attend school anymore Darry still never let him leave the house. Not on a weeknight anyhow.

"Course he knows." Steve winked in my direction and lost his balance, falling face forward onto the sidewalk.

"Jeez Steve, do I have to carry you now?" Sodapop laughed before he himself fell, only a meter away from me I might add. The drunken bastard almost took me down with him.

"Guys, get your asses off the ground and get home" I commanded. They didn't budge, just continued their laughing. "That's it. I'm not waiting around all night you know that right?" Laughter was the response. I went to leave, but my conscious which I'm surprised I have took the better of me and I ended up hauling the both of them to their feet.

"Lets go girls" I laughed, gripping each one by their arms and leading them back down the sidewalk towards the Curtis'. Going back there hadn't been my plan, it was party night but knowing Darry he'd kill me if he knew that I'd seen Soda and hadn't made him go home. Steve, could have stayed out for all I cared and I would have let him but it seemed like he could use the rest.

"Awe come on Doe, let us stay out a few more hours" Steve whined.

"Randle…"

"Why you gotta be so mean" Sodapop tried tugging out of my hand.

"Soda, I will smack you if I hafta. You want that?" He shook his head, no. "Steve?"

"What!" he yelled. I cupped him roughly upside the head. "Hey!"

"That's what."

I pulled the door to the Curtis house open and pushed the two of them inside. Pony was standing around the kitchen with Johnny, talking about something, I didn't know what though. I couldn't see Darry, but he must have been home.

"Hey, Pony." He looked up. "Tell Darry to watch these two okay? And he better thank me for personally walking them home too."

I waved a quick goodbye to him and gave Johnny a quick kiss on the cheek. He blushed and gave me a short hug. Its was so lifeless that it was barely anything at all. If I ever got a hold of his folks, I'd kill them. Not because they beat him and made him feel unwelcome in his own damn house, but because they'd changed him into a scared heap of bruised flesh with greasy hair. The run in with the Soc's a while back hadn't helped either. I'd jumped one for doing that to poor Johnny too. Dallas had been watching me from just down the street and when I pulled out my blade he finally dragged me away from the Soc, cussing me out the entire time because I would probably start a rumble or something. Never happened and on the plus side I'd gotten my revenge.

"Bye."

I ran, faster than I ever have in my life. My feet never slowed down until I landed with a hard thud on Buck's lawn. Wheezing and panting, I sucked in the much needed air. Hank Williams played loudly from inside the house. After my short rest, I was up again and inside. Within minutes I had begun mingling with fellow greasers and greasettes. I circulated about the room about a dozen times, breathing in the second hand smoke and hair grease. A group of hoods including some of the Shepard gang and a few of the Brumly Boys were playing poker in the dining room, if that's even what you'd call it. I stumbled upon the game when I went looking for another beer.

"Hey honey, you lost?" A member of the Shepard gang flashed me a sly grin.

"Do I look lost?" I wrenched the beer out of the fridge and dragged a chair to their table. "Deal me in."

"What?" a Brumly Boy asked. "You ain't playin with us sweety."

I sipped my beer slowly and reached in my back pocket. The cool handle of my switchblade fell into my hands. I smiled and placed it next to my drink for all of them to see.

"Deal me in."

Two cigarettes, seven beers, and me minus five dollars later I got up from the game. Half the guys at the table were out cold and the others didn't even know what was going on. I'd seen Two-bit a few minutes earlier, drunk as usual but now he was no where to be found, so I assumed he had found a blonde.

I was all ready to go back home, to the Curtis' that is but something stopped me. Well, someone actually. A bony fingered dug itself into my left shoulder, poking me for a few seconds straight. Looking behind me I saw Angela Shepard, rum bottle in one hand and a Coke bottle in the other. She leaned forward, alcohol emanating from every part of her body so strong that I began to cough.

"Hear my brothers beat the shit out of you" she laughed and took a sip of her rum then from her Coke.

"I hear that rash of yours still hasn't cleared. How bout that huh?" She shot me a glare and tossed the Coke bottle to the ground. It shattered in front of us as the dark fizz began to soak into the brown carpet. Luckily we hadn't attracted a crowd yet. The Hank Williams music was just too loud for anyone to hear us. Most of Buck's friends had been deafened from the music anyhow.

"You sure got a sharp tongue for such a fat ass cow."

"What the hell are you doing here anyway Angel. Shouldn't you be working on the corner of Sutton, you know earning some money for your good for nothing brothers."

Angela's eyes widened.

"Greasy good for nothing bitch!" she screamed. She moved fast for a drunk, faster than I expected. Course, I wasn't the most sober person either. Angela stepped forward and with a quick hand movement managed to crack her rum bottle against my left shoulder. At least I'd been able to slide a few feet away, otherwise it would have been my head that broke the bottle. As soon as the glass fell in pieces around us I was pushing her to the ground. Angela Shepard was a good fighter but not now she wasn't. I slugged her a few times, and for the hell of it scratched her right above the left eye, hopping it would leave a scar.

"Get off me!' she cried out. Her body jerked around beneath mine, squirming about wildly. An elbow connected with my chin and a few slugs met with my face but that was all she could muster. We'd only been going at it for five minutes when a rough set of hands dragged me from a bloody Angela Shepard.

"Mac, lets go." It was Two-bit. I didn't need to look behind me to know, because he was the only one who ever called me Mac. He shoved me forward, trying to make my feet move when I wouldn't. I saw one of Tim's friends helping Angela stand back up. Her knees buckled uneasily under her weight.

"Ass…" my voice trailed off.

"Come on." Two-bit took hold of me by the arm and led me out of Buck's.

We walked back to the Curtis' in silence, only because we were both starting to feel the booze catch up with us. I thanked Matthews for walking me there even though he didn't have to and then plopped myself down into the unoccupied couch inside. What a night, was my last thought before I past out.


	5. Morning After

_Authors Note: I'm still not sure where this story is going so if it gets weird or dumb at anytime TELL ME! Thanks. Good to get my first reviews. Awe, Kodak moment lol. Hope you all like the next chapter. If anyone else reviewed and I didn't mention them than I'll be sure to do it next time I update._

_Volleyballlover- Thanks for the review. I like the nice ones, but I've never had a bad one, yet. Guess cus this is my first fic LOL. Thanks._

_Loree- I love answering questions. Umm, I made the Shepards jump Doe mainly because she was actin like an ass to them and their supposed be tough so I figured they wouldn't want to take that from her. And I guess even if Dally slashed the tires it's because Doe is close friends with him and she wouldn't tell them where he was so…ya. LOL, I hope that makes sense but I don't think so. Enjoyed the review though, and I hope that answered your question._

_Dreamer4lyf718- Loved your review, it was real encouraging to me. Thanks._

_Character Note: One more thing before you guys read the next chappie. Sorta answering Loree's note on Does character because I don't go into much detail about her. I most likely wont stop and take a breather to get her to describe herself a lot in the story but I dropped some clues I hope. She's average size, red hair, 16 years old. And she knows the gang from years back(mite mention that in the story) and their just all good friends. So, hope that helps :D._

Chapter 5:

I had a bad hangover the next morning. The sun was just starting to come up and I realized that I was the only one awake. For once the house was quiet. No one was wrestling around on the living room floor or tossing a football in the kitchen. I checked my watch and to my surprise it read six fifteen. I'd only managed to grab three and a half hours sleep, if that. A long tired moan fell from my lips and all I wanted to do was fall back into the couch and let the cushions swallow me up and let me sleep for another five hours. Instead, I got up and dragged myself past the bathroom and the Curtis brothers rooms and outside.

The morning was beautiful. A light blue and pink haze meshed across the sky, hiding the scorching sun for now. It was going to be another hot Okalahoma day.

"Hi Doe."

Ponyboy was leaning against the side of the house, taking a long drag on his cigarette. His usually greasy hair hung in front of his face. It didn't seem natural to see the tuff hair without all that grease piled in it. I waited for his eyes to take me in again like they always did when we met.

"I thought I was the only one awake. What are you doing?"

Pony blushed slightly and looked back at the sky. "Watchin the sun come up."

I let out a hard laugh. "No really?"

"Really. I like watchin it. It's nice…don't you think so?"

I had to think about it for a moment. I mean of course the sunrise was gorgeous, with all those colors mixed together like that and the sun just getting a few rays of gold through the cracks in the sky. It was a masterpiece waiting to be painted, but I just couldn't tell the kid that. Since my mother's death I'd wanted to be a tough chick, not a sentimental one who'd turn weak at the knees when they'd see a good looking guy. Pony would understand if I told him what I thought, he wouldn't laugh either. I knew he wouldn't, he was different that way. In the end though, my reputation always came first. As harsh at that may sound it was the truth. I needed to survive and a reputation made that possible for me.

"Yeah, it's okay, if you're into that kind of stuff."

Pony's gaze shifted to his worn out tennis shoes. He whispered a "Yeah" and then stomped out his cigarette.

I felt real bad just then. I'd probably made the kid feel stupid or something, which I hadn't intended to do at all. "Hey!" I began to change the subject. "What are your plans for this morning."

Pony went to walk past me and into the house, giving a slight chuckle as he did. "It's a school day. Remember?"

"Oh, that's right."

I didn't bother much with school myself. Occasionally if there wasn't much to do around town or if I just wanted to stir up a little fun I'd head on over to the ol' prison for kids. Most of the time I stayed with Dally or loitered at the DX, which really had got me thinking the past few days that maybe I should just drop out of school completely and get a job. Don't think the ol' man would like it too much, but he never paid attention to that stuff anyhow.

Back inside, the other members of the Curtis Clan had begun their morning routine. Soda was in the shower, singing to himself and cursing every time the shampoo would fall into his eyes. Darry was busying with breakfast, sipping a mug of hot coffee, and yelling at Soda to hurry up. Any moment Two-bit and Steve were bound to pop in and possibly Dally and Johnny would join them.

I took a seat on the kitchen counter next to where Darry was standing. He didn't even bother to look at me, just stretched out his big arm and swiped me off the counter.

"Hey, I was sitting there."

Darry finally looked up. "See those" he pointed over to the chairs. "Use em."

"Fine." I headed for the kitchen table mumbling "big brawny ape" under my breath as I did.

"What was that!" Darry yelled after me.

I stayed quiet, hoping he would forget it. Pony shifted his weight, nervously looking from me to Darry, wondering what his older brother might do. Darry always seemed to bug Pony a bit, never quite rubbed the kid the right way or something. I think Darry just loved his little bro too much though and those responsibilities he carried made it hard for them to have a real relationship like the one Pony and Soda shared.

Seconds slowly slipped by, Darry's eyes still digging into my soul as I sat there. I was waiting for him to pounce on me but he didn't. Or couldn't really. A loud bang echoed from the front door and a stubble faced Two-bit came rolling into the kitchen. He swayed on his feet, trying to regain his balance after having somersaulted into the Curtis'. With his heavy leather jacket strung across one shoulder and a torn Mickey Mouse shirt on, he shot me a toothy grin. I'd barely even managed to see the others piling in through door behind him.

"Come on Two-bit, we'd like to get in some time today" Steve whined, placing the heel of his hand to his forehead while shoving the greaser in front of him with the other. Two-bit took a seat next to me and let the others pass. Johnny went to go with Pony in the living room, while Steve and Dally still lingered in the doorway.

"Hangover anyone?" Two-bit, Steve, and Dally all nodded, quiet so they wouldn't disturb the pounding in their heads.

"You?" Dally asked. I nodded.

"That's not all you got huh?" Steve added. He was leaning against the far wall and facing in my direction.

"What do you mean?"

"That blood on the left shoulder of your blouse."

The gaze of a few worried greasers turned to me. I hadn't even noticed the blood stain or the slight throbbing from where Angela had cracked the bottle. I shrugged –causing myself a bit of pain- and sunk further into the chair. "Shepard" I said.

"You got into another fight with Shepard!" Dally yelled. I shot him an incredulous look. Why was he getting himself all riled up about a scratch?

"Yeah, I gave her quite a beating too."

"Her?"

"It was Angela" Two-bit supplied, still grinning although everyone else in the room had turned a bit serious. "Glory, you should have seen it. Mac completely trashed Angels face. Don't look so tuff now" he laughed. Steve hit him upside the head.

"You clown."

"What happened to your shoulder?" Dally asked, this time a bit more calmly.

"Rum bottle. Nothing big."

"Shepards ain't going to like you messing with Angela."

"Jeez Winston, relax okay? I can handle it if something happens."

"Like you did before?"

"Shit, Dally I don't need you lecturing me on the Shepards." I was really starting to get sick of him.

"Well, obviously you do!"

"That's it!"

I jumped out of my chair, the sudden movement knocking it back onto the ground. The entire gang, minus Soda who was still showering, flashed me these curious glances, probably waiting for me to scream or something. I didn't though. Except for letting the chair hit the floor, I was as calm as could be. I slipped on my leather cow boots and made my way for the door, not bothering to look back I said "Sorry bout the chair Curtis" and left the house.

Dally was right about the Shepards. They'd probably go hunting for me and then get me back for the work I'd done on their sister. Dally was always right. He was smart in that way and I hated him for that. I didn't need him to watch out for me, I could handle it myself. Actually, I probably wouldn't be able to handle it, but I'd still take it and at least try to fight off the Shepards again.

"Mac, wait up."

I heard panting and the smacking of shoes hitting the pavement a few feet behind. Two-bit breathed heavily next to me, sweat running down his face in clear wavy lines.

"Don't you exercise at all?" I laughed. He cocked an eyebrow and slung an arm over my shoulder. "What's up with Dally? Why's he been acting like such an ass?"

Two-bit chuckled. "Awe, he's always like that Mac. The hood probably feels responsible for you getting jumped by the Shepards."

"Wow."

"What?" he asked.

"Something finally came out of your mouth that made sense."

"Hey, I've said plenty of clever things."

I paused. "Yeah, uh huh. You keep lying like that Matthews and your nose will start growin." Just for the hell of it Two-bit shrieked and touched his nose to make sure it was still its original size. I smiled because the guy could just about make anyone do it. "you better get back to the Curtis', you still have school" I teased.

"How bout I skip and the two of us go back to my place for the day" he winked.

"I know what your suggesting Two-bit and don't count on it."

"Fine."

He started off back to the house, shuffling his feet pretending to be sad. Head bent and gaze fixed on the cracks in the pavement. I called after him "Matthews!"

"Yeah , you change your mind?"

I laughed. "No! But come find me after your done school. I'll be at the Dingo."

He jerked his rusty head back and fourth in a weird nod and began to run for the Curtis place faster than a bat outta hell.


	6. Truces Are Made

_Authors note: Okay don't wanna blab lots. But thanks for the reviews, everyone keep reviewing. PLEASE! And hope you like this chapter. I wanted some action and excitement to start happenin so here's a little bit. The next chapter might have a bit of Two-bits point of view in it. But if there is any changes in that I'll tell you. Okay enjoy the story. Keep readin and reviewing tho because it makes me all bubbly inside. Maybe it's the reviews that are doing that or maybe its just gas, but wutever. I love the reviews._

_Thanks goes out to:_

_Volleyballlover: Thanks so much for reviewing. I really appreciate all the support for my first fic. Grrr that someone gave you a bad review. Want me to pelt them with donuts for you? LOL._

_Not-that-kinda-gurl: Keep updating your story too. LOL! Really liked it. Okay, and thanks for reviewing mine I love it when I get reviews._

Chapter 6

During the time that half the gang was at work and the other half was at school and then Dally who just bummed around town, I'd decided to look for a job. I know, it was crazy and far from my usual lazy attitude but that's the honest truth. I'd picked up the Tulsa Times (AN/ I made that up not original forgive me.) and scanned through it over a coke at the Dingo. There were a few interesting places that were looking to hire, most of which were on the other side of town and I couldn't really be bothered to walk around that neighborhood. In the end I found a waitressing job for this little coffee shop. It sounded okay enough and was just before the tracks, so I wouldn't be right in the middle of Soc territory. The only problem I had left was the interview. I'd handed in a resume and all but the interview was going to be hard. I wasn't much of a people person, unless they were hoods and my manners weren't the greatest. I'd manage somehow. I always did.

The needle ticked slowly on my wrist watch, reading only two thirty which meant I'd be waiting around fifteen minutes for Two-bit to get out. I walked around the school yard, kicking pebbles around and flipping off any Soc's who looked my way. I really hated being there, at school that is. It didn't dig me and I didn't dig it and even if I wasn't IN school I was still near it enough for it to give me a bad feel.

"Hey Doe!"

I don't know why I looked back when I did. The voice, I mean, it didn't sound anything like Two-bits or anyone else from the gang, so why did I acknowledge them. That's what kept repeating in my head over and over when I realized that Tim Shepard was jogging towards me. I was standing in an empty school parking lot, no one would save me. I could feel the blood in my face beginning to drain and my palms grew clammy. I whipped them against the side of my jeans and then shoved them into my pockets, hopping they wouldn't start shaking. I put up that cool look like everything was okay and nodded to Tim.

"What do you want? I don't really feel like getting jumped, but…"

"You the one who got Angela all busted up?"

Shit, he knew about it. Well, he was the girls oldest brother and he knew almost everything she did. He may have been a sleazy guy and all but he was one hell of a brother. Still, why was he asking me if I'd been the one to do it. Maybe he didn't know, maybe I could lie and not get my face remodeled.

"Yeah, I did it." The words came out of my mouth so fast my head was spinning. Tim didn't say anything for a minute, just pretended to let his brain absorb the information. Almost like a sponge. Course I knew better. He wasn't really taking it in and if he was it would just leak out again because sponges eventually all get squeezed dry. Just like his head.

"Figured that much."

"Than I had you figured all wrong" I started to let the sarcasm take over my street smarts and curled a smirk on my dry lips.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, I thought you couldn't figure out your head from your ass. But NO! Here you are, proving me wrong again Shepard." His face scrunched together in a mix of surprise and pure animalistic rage.

"Watch it!" he yelled than relaxed his face again. Off in the distance I heard the faint ringing of the school bell. "Listen, I didn't come here to exchange insults with you."

"Than why did you come here?"

He sighed. "I wanna call a truce."

"Truce? What's the catch?"

"None. Just want to end this." Tim lit a cigarette and took a long drag on it. "I know I jumped you and you jumped Angela over at Buck's so I figure were about even."

"Guess so." Two-bit was running towards Shepard and me, horror etched across his face and on the faces of the two younger greasers behind him. "So, I guess I'll see ya around than?"

"Seems so. You just tell Winston…"

"Yeah, yeah. You'll do worst next time, I know. Now get outta here. You'll ruin your image by being caught in a school yard."

Tim shocked me by smirking and ran back to his truck. Two-bit's large hand rested on my shoulder and turned me to face him.

"What was that all about?" he asked, still watching Tim's truck pull back onto the road.

"Just a greaser wanting to talk is all. Nothing important" I shrugged like always and headed for the street. The others quickly did the same.

"So, what? Does he know you were the one who beat up Angela?"

"You beat up Angela?" Pony sounded worried. "Angela Shepard?"

"Was nothing honey and yeah he does know. I told him."

"Why'd you do that for?"

"Cause he asked. Sides, he ain't coming after me or nothing for it. We made a truce."

"You sure he'll keep it?" Johnny whispered. I grinned and pulled the dark greaser into a tight hug.

"Nawe, knowing Shepard he'll prolly jump me again, but not over what happened with Angela. Not this time anyway."

"Hey Doe?"

"Yeah, JC?" He smiled with a contorted face.

"Your kinda crushing me."

I pulled away suddenly, letting the thin body unravel form the pretzel form it had been in while in my grasp. Two-bit laughed at the sight of me. I was always careful around Johnny but I didn't want to seem too careful around the kid.

"Sorry kiddo."

"Its' okay, I'm not hurt or nothing."

"Yeah, she just pressed you real hard is all" Two- bit laughed even more. I punched him in the shoulder. "Doe!"

"Two-shits" I snapped playfully. "Lets go."

Together Two-bit and I dropped off Johnny and Pony back at the Curtis house so we wouldn't be responsible for anything that happened to them and then headed for the Dingo. We stayed there for a few hours until it started to get dark and Two-bit was at least a little drunk and then left. We spent another two hours stumbling around the streets of Tulsa, because Two-bit couldn't control his big mouth and like his name says had to add his two cents worth to everything he saw.

We'd walked past these blonde greasy girls who were standing outside a house smoking when Two-bit for no reason started screaming at them. Just plain hollerin at them, sayin stuff like "Hey, you girls sure are greasy. How many of you you think it takes to grease my car? Anyone? Anyone one at all wanna guess?" Than he laughs and says "Depends on how many I hit!"

The girls shot us these dirty glares and all I could do was apologize and dragged the drunk back down the road with me.

"Two-bit" I warned him. "Your loaded and annoying, head on over to the Curtis'"

"Hey, aren't ya gonna walk me?" he hiccupped. I rolled my eyes.

"Are you that much of a child. The house is two minutes awake."

"Awe, pweaze?"

"Fine lets go. I need to head home."

"Why you going to that dump?"

"Because, I forgot to pack a jacket the other night. So, I might as well grab one now and not have to worry about freezing later."

We stopped on the Curtis' doorstep and I pushed open the door.

"We'll here we are sweetheart. Safe and sound."

The drunk glaze in Two-bits eyes seemed to disappear for a minute, just a split second and he smiled a real genuine grin at me. Not the ones he used when he was being funny or trying to be nice, it was just there. It was strange. He pulled off his bulky leather coat and tossed it over at me.

"You walk around like that you're gonna catch a cold or something."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah? At least I think that's how you catch a cold? I'm no doctor but I'm sure that's how it works" he cocked an eyebrow and I laughed.

"Thanks" I whispered. He nodded and went inside.

I stood there; watching as the wooden door closed and the heat and light was sucked back into the house. Inside there was laughing and things crashing to the floor, never to be in the same whole shape they were before. I hated to leave the house, to leave the guys but my own house waited. It was the last place I wanted to visit; because I feared that my ol' man would be there, sitting around drinking and praying that I would stumble in so that he could vent his anger out on me. I never wanted to go to my house, and even though I'd sometimes mention what took place inside those grimy walls to the gang, they never really knew just how bad it was. Sure, we all knew how bad Johnny had it and how Steve's dad could be a real ass but they didn't know my dad beat me as bad as he did. They didn't know that I was afraid to go home, just that I didn't bother to go there. I was scared to tell them, not only because it would jeopardize my reputation but also it would start to make me soft and I couldn't turn into one of those girls. Not ever. Dally always told us that if you were tough than nothing could touch you and even if it was a stupid thing to quote, I believed it. With all my heart I believed it. Course, I guess when he said it he'd never of thought that my ol man would do the complete opposite, no matter how tough I was.

On the walk home, I tried not to think about what might be waiting inside for me. Just enjoyed the crisp June air and the warmth of Two-bits coat. When I saw the red T-bird in my driveway however and caught sight of the lights on in the house that was when I felt the fear take hold of me completely. Shuffling my feet up the steps, I had just reached for the doorknob when the door was suddenly jerked open from the other side. There was my ol' man, beer belly, grey stubble and harsh eyes peering into mine. He wreaked of cheap booze and cigarettes. I coughed on the stench and looked up at him. 'I wish I had a smoke' I thought, before his hand grabbed up Two-its coat and pulled me inside.

"Where the hell were you?"


	7. Red Haze

_Authors note: Hey, thanks lots for the reviews!!! :D Okay here's the next chapter, sorry I had to make you guys wait a lil longer:( but I hope you like. And there will possibly be pairing, but I'm gonna have to figure a way to put that in there. So, enjoy the chappie and sorry for the cliffy (evil laugh)._

Thanks goes out to:

**Banana4422-** Thanks for reviewing! Ya she'll be paired with one of them if I can fit it in. I was thinking about having some pairing in there but if there is its probably gonna be…OMG and I checked your profile(ya im creepy) and we have the same first name. LOL. But there are lots of Amanda's and ya just thot I shuld share that. ;) cus im a dork.

**Loree-** Ya, I didn't want Tim and Doe to be still mad at each other because Dally and him always fight and make up no matter how bad it is. So, ya, that Angela thing made it even. Keep readin :D

**Not-that-kinda-gurl:** Lol, ya I hate when people leave cliffy's but hey I couldn't write anymore and I thought why not. Thanks for the review. Gotta keep updating your story :D

**Dreamer4lyf718:** Keep the reviews comin but how you don't miss your bus from the reading. LoL

**Vollyballlover:** Sorry bout the cliff :( hehe. Ya I don't have any donuts on me right now or anything but they keep buggin u I'll be sure to pelt them. LOL. Or at least I'll try. Thanks for reviewing.

**Korin:** Lol, thanks for stopping by to read my story and taking the time to review. Ya, I'll try to update every hour but I don't think I can type out enough chapters that fast. But I'll try. Lol.

**Chapter 7:**

My body vibrated at every word that came out of my father's mouth. Inside I was kicking myself, screaming 'Run damnit, run before something happens' but every time I wanted to turn and skedaddle I just didn't. For some odd reason, I was standing there, letting him pick the right moment to attack. He would attack too, that I was sure of and I hated to be there when he did but at the lack of movement in my legs it would be a sure thing.

He raised his hand and I flinched, preparing myself for the blow. Instead, he took me by the shoulder and with brute force, threw me back. I lost my balance immediately, stumbling a few feet before finally feeling my back slam against the wall. A wicked grin pulled at the sides of his lips parting them so you could just see the tips of coffee stained teeth. I mustered some courage, held myself high and hoped for the best.

"Did you hear me?" he shouted once again. He stepped forward and I tried to step away but I'd forgotten about the wall. Damn, couldn't the wall be somewhere else. "Or does deafness come with being dumb."

"I was…" I fumbled over my words like an idiot, only proving to my father that his last statement hadn't been completely false. After those two words came out though, that was it. I couldn't think of a quick excuse and in truth, I didn't feel like giving one. I just stood there.

"Hey, you there?" I felt the harsh tapping of the palm of his hand against my head. It created this sickening thudding sound which I realized was probably me loosing any sense I had left.

I clenched my teeth and squeezed my fists tight. I did a side step, hoping to move around him and grab my coat but he shoved me back.

"Leaving again?"

"Yeah, as a matter of fact I am" I yelled back. I was sick of being pushed around and this was it. No more bullshit, not any. "I'm getting my coat and I'm getting the hell outta here." I went to move again and as I did, a wave of relief washed over me like a cool summer rain. He wasn't stopping me. Maybe he'd given up.

Suddenly I felt my cheek scratching up against the rough carpet. I looked back with horrified eyes and saw the ol man standing over me. He was at least six feet tall and gave Darry a run for his money. 'Jeez I wish Darry was here' I said as a side thought 'or anyone for that matter.' I began to prop myself up from the ground and then THUD! My chest hit the floor hard and I gasped, slightly winded. On my back I could feel the pressure of the ol man's foot as he started to press down. Tim's little injury on my ribs still hadn't repaired itself and now I heard them making some more cracking sounds while I tried to role out from under the foot.

"Please" I whimpered, sliding out half of my front torso. The pressure increased one more time and my ribs made one final crack before the foot was gone completely and a hand was dragging me to my feet. My knees buckled as I swayed uneasily. Rooms were tilting to the sides and the ol man was shouting and he backhanded me twice but I was hardly paying attention anymore. I was off in my own world, waiting for it to just be all over but it didn't end it just kept on going. A metallic taste was filling inside of my mouth. I swallowed quietly, afraid that if I was too loud I'd just make everything worse.

"You little good for nothing bitch" he screamed one more time and his fist collided with my face. I stumbled but he pulled me back into place. "Just like your mother!"

That was it. I could stand the insults, the beatings, anything but that. My mom may have left and everything but she was still the woman who'd raised me. She took care of me more than he ever had and ever would. With all the strength I had left, I swung at him, landing a good south paw to his jaw. Immediately afterwards blood began to slide down his chin from where I'd split his lip.

"Fuckin whore" he shouted and grabbed hold of my right arm and pulled me into him. He was like an animal, ripping and tearing at me like it was nothing. I could feel his hot breath, burning my skin as he leaned closer and pressed his lips firmly against the side of my neck. I squirmed about but his grip tightened. His free hand tore apart the front of the cloth on my blue shirt and I felt his hands pinching and poking at my bare skin. I cried, the tears slipping down my face before I could catch them.

"Let me go!" I yelled. My elbow dug into his side and as soon as he'd taken me in he'd let me go. Drained of any energy, I fell back to the floor. Curses echoed through the house. A shadow fell upon the floor and I shook once again before his foot met with my back three times, the last one the most painful one and then there was just silence. He slipped back into the ebony and there was nothing else. No sounds, no voices just quiet.

I was bleeding and bruised and felt like leaving myself to lie there for a few years because that was how long I'd need to be well enough to get up. My head spun and my stomach turned when I'd risen to my feet. I dragged my feetall the way out the door and the few blocks I could walk. The Curtis' were still more than three blocks away, I wouldn't make it. Two-bit, he lived about two blocks but he'd be out, and Steve's house wasn't an option. Dally practically lived with Buck, Buck had parties, I didn't want to end up there without Dally like this. I was screwed.

Pain shot through my body and I fell to my knees right near the park. Tears of pain leaked out and I brushed them away impatiently. I struggled through the wet grass, hopping to make it to a bench or a picnic table before I collapsed once more. The churning of my stomach grew more intense with every step and the throbbing of my body wasn't getting any better. With one more foot left in front of me to the bench seat my legs gave out and my strength dispersed. I could feel myself tilting forward in slow motion, that's how everything seemed to be happening. First I saw my knees folding inwards and then I saw the left side of my face meeting the corner of the bench seat head on. The next thing I knew there was this burning sensation and I was laying on the ground in a red haze before the darkness finally overtook everything.


	8. A Joker's Tears

_**Author's Note:** okay most of this prolly in Two-bits point of view or at least the beginning. And um sorry bout the short chappie this one WILL be long but give a gal a break I work, and go to school I need to sleep sometime. LOL and glad you enjoyed the last chap so much, I thot it was real bad :S guess not. YAY!_

_Thanks again kiddies:_

_**Not-that-kinda-gurl:** Sorry  but I try my best. Remember they were able to put humpty dumpty back together again. Right? Oh, no they couldn't ooops. Well, don't worry I'll do my bestest to mend it all. pats her on the shoulder Don't cry. LOL_

_**Tigressinthemist:** Thanks a lot for the review. Ya guess the dad isn't going to win any awards as the favourite character. Don't worry about the Dally & Two-bit thing either I have a feelin they'll be in here ;) It's almost like you read my mind Wink wink lol. Enjoy._

_**Dreamer4lyf718:** Okay, whatever you do don't pop. I need the reviews. LOL. Ya no one likes her dad awe I wonder why tho. Thanks for the wow's lol you gave me lots I enjoyed it. Keep on readin waves fist jk of course._

_**Volleyballlover:** LOL thanks for reviewing. I was on a few minutes after I posted the last chapter and immediately after you had reviewed it. LOL. Thanks tho._

_**Second Author's Note:** Okay I know one author's note is enough. But a lil snippet the next chaper shuld be posted up right after this one sometime tonight if I don't fall asleep but if its not chapter 9 will be up sometime Friday. This chappie is especially long I find tho :D and good. Lots of TB(guess who it is). And thx for thinking the last one was good I thot it wasn't too great and I wanted to make the dad mean but I didn't find him too cruel but guess you guys did so MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. THANKS. KEEP READIN. SORRY I KEEP TALKIN ENJOY :D_

Chapter 8

Two-bits (POV)

The Mickey Mouse show had just finished about ten minutes ago and now with Doe gone to her place and all the alcoholsucked dryfrom my system I was bored once again. Darry and Pony were just sitting around in the living room with Johnny and Dally while Soda tried to cheat his way through a game of poker with Steve and me. Steve cheated too, but that was how the game worked. It didn't bother me none anyhow causeI was too busy thinking of more exciting things to do.

"What the hell is this Two-bit?"

I jolted back to reality and realized that the cards I'd stuffed up my sleeve were slowly sliding out onto the wooden table one at a time. I grinned and leaned forward, fixing the newly fallen cards.

"What does it look like I'm doing?"

"Cheating" Soda said. I cocked an eyebrow and made a shocked expression on my face.

"Cheating? Never. I'm just playing a lil poker." I laid the cards in a single row and turned them to the guys, "Looky here, I gots me a full house."

Steve yelled in frustration and got to his feet, throwing his own hand down which was nothing more than a pair of five's. "Two-bit, you cheater!"

"Don't bust a vain or nothing there Steve." Fire flashed through his eyes.

"Two-bit, just…"

"I think I'm gonna go fetch some action. Anyone in?" I looked back to the living room. Darry shook his head, work most likely, Pony shook his head too, school. Johnny just shrugged and Dally leapt at the chance, grabbing Johnny up off the couch at the same time. "Lets go girls." I told them in a high pitched voice. Soda laughed and began to deal Steve into a new game of poker. "Bye Stevo" I punched him on the shoulder but he only grunted. "Sour puss" I mumbled.

It was cold outside, with a strong frigid wind that stung when it hit you. Course you never really got used to the cold out here. Even the wind always seemed different but you could always count on it being there, unless it was just plain muggy and hot out.

Johnny was shuffling his feet in front, while Dally and me hung in the back, talking about nothing too important.

"So, you hear about the truce?" I said out of nowhere. It wasn't really outta nowhere though, we'll to them maybe, but in my head I'd been thinking about it. Doe kept passing through my mind, getting caught up in all the other senseless thoughts that came to me. She was closer to me than some of the gang, only because I felt for her the way Dally felt for Johnny. Johnny was his, to look after and Doe was mine. She was so tough, it broke my heart sometimes to see her act that way. Doe was a good person, didn't hurt anyone on purpose or jump people for fun like some of the other hoods around. She wasn't like any of the greasy chicks either; she was just a JD(juvenile delinquent) like the rest of us. Her tough shell I'd try to crack with every chance that came my way and I wanted more than anything to break it but you could tell she'd never let that happen. There was a certain look of determination in her eyes. Those emerald orbs told her life. The pain was incased inside of them and with a hatred towards the world that reflected just so harshly that it made me wonder what she'd really gone through. 'One day' I thought to myself, trudging through some damp grass 'I'll get her to open up a little more.'

"Hey, Two-bit!" Dally's knuckles hit the side of my arm roughly. I looked over into his frozen eyes and sighed.

"What was that for?"

"Quite you're damn whining and answer my question?"

"Huh?"

"Shit, the truce you were talking about. I didn't hear anything."

"Oh, Tim settled things all nice with Mac. Says their even after she flattened Angela and all."

Dally's eyes widened then relaxed. "So, she did jump Angela. Didn't think she could."

"Well, she did" I laughed out loud remembering the sight after Doe had finished. "I had to dragged her off, shoot it was…"

"Dally?"

Dally and I both stopped walking. Johnny was standing a foot or so in front of us, body trembling slightly and hands fidgeting nervously as his sides. A long twisted finger pointed off to the park. I tried to look at what he'd seen but the darknesswas thick and a fog had risen up blocking out anything and everything. Dally rested a reassuring hand on Johnny while I stood close by, still squinting my eyes.

"You okay kid?" Dally whispered, although his voice was still rough and uncaring. Johnny shook his head, and without saying another word took off in a mad dash towards the park. Dally just looked at me. "Where the hell is he going?"

I shrugged. 'Wow, I'm starting to take after Doe' I thought than followed Johnny's lead.

My feet slid across the damp grass, the midnight dew leaking into my shoes and numbing my toes. The wind had died down but something still sent a string of chills to run through me. I didn't know why, there was just something that didn't seem right. Johnny would never run off on Dallas like that, especially into the park so late at night. Socs could jump you so easily that way and I knew Johnny wouldn't want to get in there way. So why'd he left like that? Why'd he...My legs froze. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Johnny was stopped, this time standing over a crumpled figure on the ground. Their body was laying there twisted and bent at awkward angles that I figured were impossible to accomplish.

"Dally…" his frail voice trailed off. Johnny got down on his knees and ran a dirty hand across the person's back. The body shook for a moment than once again was still. I went to the other side and began to turn the figure over ever so gently. My hands were big and rough but I tried to be as careful as possible because even though the person was out cold it wasn't hard to tell they were still in pain.

Reaching under the stomach, I pushed them onto their back. Red blood soaked curls hung in tangled clusters shadowing the face and any other damage. A hand quickly combed them aside, I don't know whose, it must have been Johnny's because Dallas was still watching from a distance. I wasn't really looking at anyone except the cold body that was sprawled out in front of me. The curls fell to the sides and then there she was. Pale skin peppered and sprayed with a sickening color I'd never expected to see on her. Her lips where tinted a purplish blue and tiny slits marked her cheeks.

"Mac?" I whispered, the word barely even coming out at all. I fought back tears as I pulled her close to me. She was still wearing my leather jacket.

"Fuck." Was all Dally could say and he was rushing around, trying to check Doe to see if she was okay. For the first time in my life I saw real concernetched in his eyes.

"Oh…" Johnny gulped and I saw him running away from us. I raised my gaze from Doe for a split second and caught him falling to his knees and suddenly break out into a series of tremors. From my arms I felt Doe shake for minute and then stop once again.

"Mac? Come on, can ya hear me?" I talked to her in a soothing tone, my voice cracking at every second word. Her body rolled around against mine and out of nowhere she broke into sobs and fought against my arms. I couldn't tell if she was awake or not but she was fighting pretty damn hard. My hands gripped the sides of her arms tighter and I pulled her up against my chest. "Don't worry" I said into her ear. "I ain't gonna let nothing happen to you. Not ever again." She stopped struggling and I saw signs of her waking up. Her lids fluttered and glazed emerald eyes stared up at me. A single tear streaked her face, leaving behind it a glistening trail.

"Two-bit…" her voice came out in a low raspy sound. Oh, god I wanted to hold her so tight. "I…"

"Mac, don't you talk. Don't say nothing."

She didn't listen. "I'm sorry…I …I got your…jjjjaaacket all ssstttaaaiiiinnneeeddd uuuppp…"

I shook my head but she had already lost consciousness and her body lay slack in my arms once more. Dally peaked his blonde head up from her feet. He looked like he wanted to break down, but he wouldn't. Not now. He'd seen too much I figured.

"Matthews, go back and get help." I looked at him like he was crazy.

"What about Doe!"

"We can't carry her back to Darry's. She wont make it and it'll take too long."

"I'm not going" I stated stubbornly. Dally grunted and stalked towards me.

"Your really something you know that" he laid his jacket on the grass and placed Doe on top of it before hauling me to my feet. "Don't argue with me again! Now, run your ass there and get someone."

I watched Doe still laying there, unconscious and in pain and all I wanted was to be with her, to keep her safe and make sure nothing would harm her but Dally was right. She needed help and if some Soc's came by Dally'd be able to fend them off better than I would.

Weak legs carried me just the few blocks I needed to run back to the Curtis house. The entire way there I couldn't help but think about Doe. 'Why was I thinking about her so much?' 'Because she's dying you idiot. No don't say that. She was probably gonna be fine. But all that blood…' Tears escaped from the corners of my eyes. I didn't care. A light was still lit inside the house when I got there but everything else except that was out. Most of them save for Steve and Soda were more than likely asleep. I panted, and turned the doorknob, resting against it at the same time so that I ended up falling into the house. Soda raised his head in surprise but settled right after when he noticed me there on the floor. He smiled and continued his game of cards with Steve.

My arms and legs shook, while I wiped away the tears on my face and got to my feet. I stared at my hands, shocked tofind some of Doe's blood coating my fingers. Ponyboy was stepping out of the bathroom when I'd reached my full height again and was now staring at me. He blinked a few times, taking me in.

"What's wrong?" his voice squeaked. I felt so small and dumb just standing there while Doe was out in the park, slowly fading away. A lump rose up in my throat which I figured was either my heart or lunch and I tried to swallow it while getting out everything as quickly as possible.

"Mac out in the park…blood in her hair…coat stained…"

Soda pushed his chair back and ran into Darry's room. Ponyboy was slipping on his shoes when a half awake Darry came to loom over me. He seemed angry at first but it was worry that was making his face sag so.

"What happened Two-bit?" I shook my head and looked to the door. Darry grabbed my shoulder and turned me to him. "What's going on?"

"Johnnycake…he found Doe in the park, she was out cold." I wanted to be there right now. Helping warm her and making her feel safe. He nodded to me and we made our way to the truck. I stopped Darry by his shirt sleeve, holding him back like a child. "Darry, there was so much blood…"

"Relax," he said gruffly and climbed into the truck with Soda and Pony. Steve and I hopped into the box of the truck and sat quietly, letting the cool wind ruffle our hair while we drove to the park.

"Mac" I whispered before shutting my eyes so the tears woudln't have a chance to fall again.

&& Note&&: OMG okay this i thot was sad. I'm sorry but poor Two-bit. And ya i no greasers r tuff but two-bits a sweety and i didnt want him bein real tuff sein doe. so :P


	9. Broken Broad

_**Author's: Note:** Last chapter I reread right after and its dumb but I thot it was sad. Okay so here's the next one don't know how long it will be cus its late but I thot I'd throw another fast one out there. The next one will be up on Friday sometime. Enjoy this one. And it'll be in Doe's point of view. Lil TB thing at the end tho._

_Thanks to anyone who reviews this one and the one before. I'll thank you in the next chappie. :D_

_**Volleyballlover:** still up? oh well its 12:32 where i am so im hititn the hay now. got ur review thanks and i thot i was really sad glad i guess that you thot so too. Okay enjoy this one._

Chapter 9:

Doe's (POV)

Something heavy was pressing on my eyelids. It was wet and thick and I had to use up most of my strength just to get them to open. I was stuck in the ebony for so long that when I realized I was blinking I was shocked to find I didn't have my eyes closed anymore. Everything seemed so dark and I was so cold and scared. I couldn't remember much of anything. I didn't know where I was or what had happened, or why my head ached so bad. All I knew was someone was calling to me, whispering sweet nothings into my ear.

I searched a pair of sad eyes and heard my name called. No, it wasn't my name, it was, but it wasn't Doe. It was…Mac. I felt a big hand tightly pressing me against a strong chest, the heat emanating from the body warming mine. I smelled that awful stench that I knew only came from one person and with joy realized it was Two-bit. I wanted to smile out of relief but pain was attacking every inch of my body and I knew a grin would make it hurt more.

"Don't worry" he mumbled tiredly. "I ain't gonna let nothing happen to you. Not ever again." I relaxed at the comforting words, knowing he would hold me like that forever.

Something came over me, and I felt myelf swimming in an agony filled daze. My mouth was moving, I know that because there was a sharp burning sensation coming from my jaw area. I heard a girl's voice stuttering and pausing stupidly and then suddenly I was engulfed in black again.

The next time I came around I was a bit colder than before andI trembled, fingers pulling the leather from the jacket inwards for warmth. Someone had a hand on my shoulder but they didn't say anything or try to help me. 'Where was Two-bit?'

I opened my eyes slowly, biting back at the pain it caused and saw a figure with his knees drawn to his chest and staring at the ground. It wasn't Two-bit, that was for sure but I knew them anyway. I reached out a hand, fingers shaking uneasily while they tried to latch onto the pant leg.

"Johnny?" I moaned. Johnny lifted his head and stared back at me with round charcoal eyes that were filling with tears. He didn't say a word, just moved closer to me and took my hand.

"What happen…" I tried to say but was hushed from the person behind me. They were sure bugging me but it was a good thing I stopped talking when I did because I was starting to ache real bad again. I stared off past Johnny, moving my fingers around against his palm while watching the dark blue clouds move across the star speckled sky. Off in the distance I could hear the loud engine of a car running on and the squishing sound of sneakers in the grass. I counted the seconds, noticing with each one the sound getting louder until finally it stopped.

The hand on my shoulder released itself and something new came out to touch the side of my face. It was warm and soft against my cheek that felt so worn down and torn. Gently I felt the tips of fingers tilt my head in the direction of the moonlight.

"Damn Soc's" I heard a voice curse.

"I don't think it was Soc's." It was Dally, I could pin point that coldhearted voice anywhere.

"It was her ol man" Two-bit whispered. I felt a tear run down my cheek. That was it, I had broken. I was no longer a tough broad, I was the broken one. I whimpered slightly and pulled out of the hand touching me.

"Doe" a person calmed. "Don't move much. You'll make it worse."

"Darry she's scared." The person with soft hands raised my body into a sitting position. Soda was looking at me worriedly, hands quivering while they held me up. I gasped feeling the torturous anguish as my ribs made these awful sounds. People danced in front of me and everything started spinning around and tilting to the sides. I reached around my waist and moaned, before spitting up on Soda's lap. Tears layer the brim of my eyes by now and I thought I was dying. I didn't want to sit up anymore it was just too much.

"Two…" I coughed, the metallic flavor mixing with that of all the foods I'd had in the past twenty-four hours. Soda shook his head and began to lift me to my feet. I'd barely reached a few inches off the ground when my knees folded in and I started to fall back down. Another hand suddenly took me by the other arm. It was Darry. The hands were much rougher.

"Come on kid, we're gonna get you all cleaned up."

The ground trembled beneath my toes and someone lifted me into their arms. My body jumbled around against their chest as we made our way towards the running vehicle. I felt the soft cushion beneath my body and finally rested my eyes, just long enough to get rid of the pain for a few minutes.

In two tiny slights, I played my eyes across the room. I was lying on a bed, on top of a dozen sheets wearing only my jeans and a bra. Nothing covered me and I sighed, letting the cold sink into my bones. There were a few people talking near me but I couldn't see them, the light was just too bright. A cold hand touched my skin, sending ripples of pain and sudden panic to shoot through me.

"Mac, we gotta fix your ribs." I stopped trembling and looked beside me to find Two-bit sitting in a wooden chair, hand squeezing mine reassuringly. "Don't worry none. Steve is gonna be gentle."

Again the hand rubbed against me but this time I only flinched and settle back down right after. Two-bit smiled and I shut my eyes, gritting my teeth while I felt the bandages pulling my ribs back together.

"Almost done" Steve whispered. I gulped and nodded slightly.

"Pony, go grab a couple Tylenols" someone ordered and soon after I found myself swallowing three white pills down with a glass of milk.

"Don't go nowheres" I said groggily to no one in particular and smiled at Two-bit before passing out.

Two-bit(POV) –JUST FOR A SEC

I stared down at her, watching as her eyes shut. Her face was scrunched in pain and I felt like running down to her place and ripping her dad apart. No one should be that mean to their kid, no one. I ran a hand through her matted hair and cringed.

I leaned down and kissed her gently on the forehead. "Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere" I whispered.


	10. Life:like it or not

_**Author's Note:** Okay, thanks for all the reviews as usual and to tell you guys I didn't feel at all like writing tonight but because I promised heres a chapter. Mite be short, mite be bad I don't know. I hope it isn't tho but I'm tired and so enjoy. Oh, and I'll be starting another story sometime and I still have no idea where this one is going but ya._

_Thank goes out to :_

_ScarlettFugitive- Thanks lots for the review. I mean that truthfully too not in anyway sarcastic. I gotta admit I was kinda sad/mad what you wrote but ya it seriously is true. I appreciate the critism and I know a lot of people hate the Mary-Sue stuff but I checked out that website and LOL ya it is Mary-Sue, only some things tho. I'm still taking your advice tho when I do my next story and I hope I achieve something a lil better. I don't mind Mary-Sue stories just as long as their not really corny and this one seem like it could turn down that road but I'll stop it. I am trying to make this character different than the others. But I thank you for what you wrote. I hope you come back to see this so you know that I am in fact thankful for it._

_Not-that-kinda-gurl- Im SUPER glad you aren't crying anymore. Thanks for all the reviews you've given me, hope this chapter is good too._

_Loree- Ya, poor Doe. I'm so mean to her, letting her get beat up all the time but oh well. I don't think she's too mad at me . Thanks for the review._

_Tigressinthemis- Awe, I'm glad you thought he was sweet. I thought he was too. Glad you enjoyed the chapters. Keep Reading :D_

_Dreamer4lyf718- WHAT? As if you got a snow day. Jeez, I never get snow days, well, I do but not lots. Happy to know that I made it better, but I don't think a snow day can really be topped. LOL_

_Banana4422- Thanks for the review. I'll try my best to get them together but I don't know where I'm going with this and I don't know if they will :(. But who knows, it could happen. :D_

_Volleyballlover0- Okay, here's the chapter I promised you guys. Bleh, I didn't want to write but can't break that promise. Hope you like this one, bit shorted but ya its okay. You won't need a Kleenex, or at least I didn't need one. Enjoy and thanks bunches._

Chapter 10

I was sweating and uncomfortable underneath the heavy blanket tucked beneath me. Hot humid air filled in the only empty corners of the room where clothes hadn't been thrown about carelessly. For a moment I was confused with my new surroundings, but I heard a loud voice coming from outside the room and that familiar crashing sound to follow and recognized immediately that I was laying in Darrel Curtis' bed.

"Damn him" I muttered, shoving the covers off my battered form. I hadn't been much of a looker in the beginning but now I was sure whatever beauty I had possessed had been flushed down the toilet. My legs shook dangerously as I got to my feet and let my full weight come down. There was pain everywhere around me. I took small quick intakes of breath, fighting back the heavy push on my chest that seemed to occur when I did this.

I stumbled/limped into the kitchen and then quickly forced myself to walk properly when I saw a few greasey heads in the living room. Dally was asleep on the couch, while Johnny and Ponyboy talked in low voices. Two-bit was on the hard wood floor, volume on the television turned up high and loud. I was glad he wasn't fussing over nothing, or at least acting a little considerate like Ponyboy and Johnny. I'd have said the same thing for Dally who was unconscious but I don't think he meant to be polite like that, I think if he realized he was he would have woken up.

"Two-bit turn that shit off."

Two-bit smiled and looked over in my direction. He cocked an eyebrow and turned it up louder. I sighed, shook my head and rolled my eyes.

"Come and turn it off yourself."

"That's okay, I have to leave anyway" I said and headed back through the kitchen and into the bathroom. I went over my face first, shutting my eyes until I could muster up enough courage to look. I was still standing there when Pony walked by. He stuck his head in for just a moment and chuckled quietly to himself. "What?"

"Nothin, you just look funny is all." I raised my eyes. "No, not like that. I mean…"

"Get lost" I laughed and closed the door.

In the mirror a cut up and purple face stared back at me. My face wasn't what had taken most of the beatings from the night before but what Tim and the ol' man had done had created a montage of blood and pain. A lot of water and makeup would fix it a bit but wouldn't hide everything and makeup dried out my skin and faded away into a bad color. Course with an interview ahead of me that day I had no other option.

I walked into Pony's room and grabbed my duffel bag I'd left there a few nightsealier and headed back into the washroom. Clean warm water rinsed off most of the dried blood that had caked on my skin overnight and I had begun to pile on some powered to my face when someone knocked at the door.

"Scram!"

"Hey, Doe I gotta pee" Two- bit whined.

"Go find a bucket er something. I'm doing my makeup."

There was a laugh and then another knock. "What?" I pulled open the door and stared back at Two-bit sullenly.

"I said I'm doing my makeup. Now come in, go pee and get the hell out. Okay?"

"Fine." He walked past me into the bathroom and lifted up the lid. I'd only been watching for a second and then I was back to doing my makeup. I was coating my face in it, trying my best to hide anything but in the end it didn't work, just made me look trashier than I was.

Tinkling sounds made their way from a foot beside me and I smiled, knowing Two-bit probably didn'tcare that he was going to the bathroom all open in front of me. When he was done, I felt a slight shove and moved for him to wash his hands.

"Jeez, I've never seen water actually touch yourskin before. Like to clean it."

"Well, that's because I ain't never had a lady to worry about. But now I've got you here and I gotta keep clean with the ladies present."

"What? I ain't know lady. I'm a broad. Besides, I doubt those ladies your talking about would ever want you anyway." He frowned and gave me a short hug.

"You okay?" he asked when he finally pulled away.

"What are you talking about?"

I didn't feel likechatting about what had happened. Not with the gang, not even Dally who I knew had gone through tougher things. It was strange but I still loved my ol' man but only because he was family. The same blood that ran through his veins ran through mine and that still meant something to me even though I'd been treated so bad. I may have been standing there, barely able to hold my ground because of him and I'd stilldefend the guy. I just felt ashamed of how I'd broken and I was going to do my best to repair that and the first thing was going to be ignoring all the pain, all the feelings I was having.

"Doe," Two-bit took my arm and pulled me further into the bathroom, closing the door behind us. I was starting to get scared. He never called me by my real name, never. I was always Mac, but why was this time different? I only remembered some stuff from the night before, the breaking down, the parts where I cried into the pillow and Two-bit sayin something to me before I passed out. I must have let him in while I was hurt. That's it. That's why he was staring at me with concern in his voice and eyes still wide. I'd let him come to close. "Look at you, you think this is nothing?"

"I don't feel like arguing" I responded through clenched teeth. I went to reach for the door but Two-bit slapped my hand away. "What are you doing?"

"You ain't going back there. Not after what happened."

"My stuffs there. It's my home. Why shouldn't I go back?"

"Maybe because when you came back from there last time your ribs were sticking out your side and your head was leaking red."

"That's life. Deal with it, I have."

"Please," he stepped forward and wrapped his hands around mine, raising my head so I was looking him in the eyes. _This wasn't going to happen,_ was all I could think off. _Sorry Two-bit, but I can't let you get close to me_. "Just relax and sit okay, your just a little worked up. We can talk about this later."

I took a deep breath, shook my head and pulled my hands out from his.

"Listen, whatever happened last night won't happen again. I'll think of something okay? But, this." I gestured to our hands. "I mean you acting this way. I don't want it. I can take care of myself well enough, I don't need someone to worry about me. Thanks for being there last night, but its over. I'm fine."

"Doe, your not fine. Look at the way your acting…"

"I have to go to an interview."

With that, I walked past him and opened the door. The three boys were still in their original positions but this time Dally was snoring, instead of breathing peacefully. I pulled out a t-shirt and a pair of jeans from Pony's dresser and changed into them because we were almost the same size. Two-bit just watched me from the hall, eyes lowered in disagreement.

"Lighten up" I yelled, and threw Pony's shirt on. "I'll come back later if I don't find anything else to do."

I left the house, praying that I did find something else. I'd search the entire town, East Side and West Side if I had to. Two-bit was taking everything too serious. I knew it was more than a few scratches and busted up ribs, but I didn't want it to be more. I needed to be tough and to be tough I needed him to not act like I was eleven again andunable to defend myself. He'd helped me then but I didn't need his help now.

Flashback (POV 3d person) Just to clarify this is when Doe was 11

_A short redhead girl raised her fists and then leapt at the two older kids. They were clean cut boys, while she had her hair in different lengths with dirt smudged across her face. She was a chubby thing, with round cheeks and a tiny nose._

_"Get off me you dirty greaser" one of the boys shouted and jumped to his feet. The girl tumbled from the body and hit the ground. She cursed and tried to get back up to defend herself but the two kids were already looming over her, their own fists now raised. A small whimper fell from the little girls lips as she felt the painful thrust of someone's knuckles cut into her skin._

_"Hey, you!" A tear rolled down her face and she whipped it away out of embarrassment. Looking up, she realized the boys were running away from her, while another boy a few years older than herself stopped and kneeled down on sidewalk. He took her in to make sure she was fine then roughly hauled her to her feet. "You ain't crying are you?" he asked puzzled._

_The girl stiffened and shook her head with a cold expression washing over her face. "No, I'm not. Sides, what's it to you?"_

_He laughed. "Glory, I was only joshing you." He grinned and cocked an eyebrow. "What's that cut on your shoulder?"_

_"It's just a scratch. From my cat."_

_"How's your face?"_

_"Fine, how's yours" she snapped. The boy only smiled wider and threw an arm around her shoulder._

_"Your weird" he mumbled._

_"Your ugly." The two looked at each other and laughed._

_End of Flashback._

I stopped, standing just outside the Curtis house, wondering if leaving Two-bit like i had was the right thing to do. He was a great guy and could make me smile even when i felt like punching his head in, but there i was, debating whether or not i cared enough about him to talk about the truth. About what really went on when the ol' man was home.

My hand tightened on the railing, knuckles slowly turning white. I shivered, even though it was hot out. I wanted to scream, to fall onto my knees. I wanted so badly to talk to someone about howIfelt, butI couldn't. It just wasn't possible.

Someone shouted inside the house and a few lower yells followed.

"I'm sorry" i whispered looking at my feet and pausing.I stepped off the porch and back into reality, not bothering to take a second glance at the house while I disappeared into the distance.


	11. According to Twobit

**_Author's Note:_ _Okay, I'm sorry I took so long to update. Don't be mad, please and I hope there are still people reading this. I'm getting stumped with this story but I've got a few ideas rolling around. The end for this will be coming soon and I'm still thinking of what is going to happen. So if there are any ideas throw them my way of wut u'd like. Can't promise anything but it might trigger something who knows. I know the ending will be sad though. :( This chapter is okay i guess, maybe you'll like it better than me or you'll go meh its ok. I've been really stumped but i felt bad bout not updating. Cant start something and not finish it rite. SO, enjoy._**

**_Thanks goes out to:_**

**_Volleyballlover: Thanks_** _**a lot, that means a great deal because I wasn't really sure bout the last one. This one hopefully will have more drama and action. That's what I like in stories. Build up and then end it. Anyway, hope you like this chapter. Sorry again about not updating quickly enough. Maybe this will make up for it?**_

_**Dreamy4lyf718: OMG, Soda is totally hot in the movie! Jeez, even without being in that movie I thought he was hot just as a fictional character, Rob Lowe just made it better :D How you didn't pop because I didn't update too soon. LOL. I'm so glad you think Two-bit is good in this story. He's one of my favorites and I didn't want to mess up his character. :P Keep readin and review. Hope you enjoy.**_

_**Ninaelis: Okay, I know the review was for chapter 1 but I'm thanking you in this one. I'm so happy more people like my story. Ya, I think I'll include some more Timmy in here, around the very end. :o who knows. LOL. Well I do, but besides me. Okay, keep reading :D**_

**Chapter 11:**

After my interview, I spent the rest of my day dragging myself around Tulsa, finally ending up at the Dingo by six. It hadn't really gone as good as I would have hoped. The woman who managed the shop was rude, wore too much mascara and had a voice as dry as sandpaper. I just sat across from her, staring at the clumped pieces of black dangling from her lashes. It was disgusting. You'd think she'd notice that her makeup wasn't on well. Than, the woman had the nerve to flash me these awful glares, the same ones I'd received many a times before from Socs. Those looks that said 'I'm better than you and I know it.' I just kept my mouth shut though, and let her do her job, asking me question after question for about fifteen minutes and then, it was over. I couldn't wait to be out of that place but I had nowhere to go. That's when I ended up at the Dingo.

I was sitting alone in a booth next to a wide window that faced the parking lot. My lips were wrapped around a straw that was sunk far into my dark fizzing Coke. A good dose of cola was all I needed to get me through the day. I tried to smile, hopping to take my mind of the woman who still had my blood boiling. Outside in the parking lot, a few greasy hoods I'd met only once, leaned back against their banged up cars and trucks, and passed around a freshly rolled joint. Smoke hung above their heads, the fumes coming back down and intoxicating them a second time. They seemed so care free and happy. It made me want to go back to the Curtis' and just relax and not worry so much. Who cared if I got the job? I didn't need all that money really. And just because I had to be tough didn't mean I had to be a stiff bitch, especially towards Two-bit.

The rest of my Coke I chugged hurriedly and took off at a slow jog out into the early night air. My watch read six fifteen. Still enough time to make better with Two-bit and have a good time. Parts of my body still ached and throbbed horribly from the night earlier. Walking wasn't really my forte at the moment, I'd probably give up my last two dollars for someone to give me a ride, but no one I knew drove by. Hitchhiking wasn't really something I enjoyed either, not since when I was thirteen and I got picked up by the wrong guy. Nothing happened, and nothing was going to. So, I walked.

A pin and needle feeling crept up the back of my neck as the cool wind sliced through me. The sun was setting off in the distance; I smiled picturing a dreamy eyed Ponyboy sitting on his front porch, staring back at the sky. What a kid, I thought.

I was no more than two or three blocks from the Curtis' when I felt my side cramping up. The bandages were getting loose around my ribs, letting them bounce around torturously. There was an alley that opened up near a field not too far from where i was. The guys used the field to play football a lot and I knew by cutting through there I'd be saving myself ten minutes. Little did i knowthat wasn't all I'd be saving though.

Stepping out of the alleyway, I began my long trudge through the ankle high grass, the cool dew soaking the ends of my jeans. I was humming, kicking the stray pebbles that had found their way onto the green. Up ahead, about a yard away was the next street over and then after that I'd be all warm and cozy in the…

Something rustled in the grass a few feet to my left. My heart beat hard against my chest, daring to tear through my shirt. I wouldn't be able to put up a fight, nota good onein my condition anyway. I searched the open area for any signs of a tough looking hood or a clean cut Social. There was no one. Again, I heard moving. I stepped to the left and heard the faint sound of a whimper. I cringed inside myself but ventured forward until I found the source of the noise.

A crumpled figure, with his knees pulled to his chest lay on the ground. Beneath a muddy jean jacket, the body vibrated, moving his side against the dirt some more. I bit my lip, held back the pitying tears that were aching to fall and reached out for the person. My strong, thin hand gripped the right shoulder and the body stopped. I turned them over to face me, the jacket sliding down from a pale, tear stained face. Big, greenish grey eyes looked back at me. I could feel my legs growing weak and I let them bend and hit the earth below. My fingers combed back some stray hairs that shadowed the kids eyes.

"Oh, god…" I mumbled voice as tough as I could make it. The eyes went over me, taking in my form before the mouth opened in a crooked unsure smile.

"Doe?"

Ponyboy slowly forced himself into a sitting position. Dark purple replaced the lightly tanned skin beneath his left eye and a few not very deep cuts marked up his cheeks and neck. He was holding his stomach where he'd undoubtedly felt most of the beatings. I didn't bother to ask him how he was, because the pain was evident in his glazed eyes. Soda's jacket, which I know recognized, hung off his shoulders awkwardly, revealing a track shirt.

"You okay kid?" He grunted and struggled to his feet. I followed suit, getting up before him and looping an armaround his. I felt him shrugging it off, but I only held on tighter. "What happened?"

Together, with the help of my guiding arm and the extra support, Pony and I made it out of the field. He didn't answer my question right away, only muttered a few swears into the air and let out a few sounds that I'd never heard before. We were only a couple of minutes from his house when he finally stopped, pulled me further away from the road and began.

"I was" he sighed, took a deep breath and exhaled before continuing. I felt bad that he had to muster up that much strength to tell me. "I was coming home from track. Coach kept me a bit later because of the meet in a few weeks. Didn't think I'd be there too late but by the time I got out Steve was at work and I didn't want to hassle him for a ride. He hates it enough as it is." I nodded. Steve really didn't care for Pony that much. He'd told me.

"And" I pushed.

"So, I walked home. Darry told me not to cross through the field. I shoulda listened to him." He began to trail off, giving himself shit for cutting through the field.

"Pony!" I snapped. He nodded.

"I was almost on the street again when I heard these feet running through the grass behind me. When I looked all I saw was this checkered top and then I was on the ground. Next thing I know there's three Socs surrounding me and I'm getting the tar beat outta me. They had a blade." Pony shivered and pointed to the nicks on his neck. "They finally left when I passed out."

He started to walk ahead, without so much as calling for me to follow. I couldn't believe this. Pony, the kid who didn't bother anyone, got jumped. Those Socs were going to pay. If I had to I'd go around the entire area of Tulsa and find the Socs who were responsible and turn them inside out.

"You passed out?"

"Yeah, after about five minutes everything just turned blacked."

I swallowed the thick lump that had risen in my throat. The ebony. I hated it and hated it even more now that I knew Pony had suffered with it. We were both standing on his porch, staring at the door, looking from one to the other, waiting to see who would be the first to open it.

"Come on."

I pulled on the knob and held open the thick slab of wood for Pony. The fresh smell of chicken and barbeque sauce filled my nostrils with its tantalizing odor. My stomach rumbled and burned, eating away at itself. The smell of food only made me more hungry and made it hurt evenmore. Darry was staring at Pony, who had stopped a foot in front of me, hands shaking at his sides.

"Where have you been. You know your thirty minutes late?" Darry didn't sound mad really, just very concerned. His rough voice didn't seem to ease the fear that I could see rippling underneath Pony's skin. I rested a hand on his shoulder, the rippling stopped.

"He was at track" I piped up. Darry flashed an anger glare my way.

"Why weren't you here resting?" I rolled my eyes and shrugged, regretting it after feeling my ribs move around a bit more.

"Had an interview. Since when am I the fourth Curtis' kid anyhow?" He just shook his head.

"Pony what happened to your face." Darry's attention was again directed at his little brother.

He lowered his head before replying. "I got jumped by some Socs. on my way home."

"What!?!"

"Cool it, huh Darry"

"You mind your own business Doe. This is my kid brother. I gotta be the one to worry about him."

"Look" I threw an arm around Pony's neck. "He's fine just a little beat up is all. Ain't nothing you can do to change what happened so don't go lecturing him. Okay?"

"Doe…"

"Darry, I'm real tired. I think I'm gonna go to bed."

Darry looked from Pony to me then nodded. "Lets get those cuts cleaned up a bit first huh."

I walked into the semi quiet living room and found Two-bit watching the weather channel, legs stretched out across the couch. Johnny was sitting on the floor with a bag of peanuts, eyes heavily engrossed in one of Pony's novels. I took a seat next to the rusty hared greaser, pushinghis lanky legs onto the ground.

"Hey, welcome back Mac" Two-bit grinned.

"Back from where?"

"Awe, you know."

"No I don't know. Enlighten me."

"Just one of those places chicks go when they get all moody and sutff."

"Moody?" I cocked an eyebrow.

"Yeah, like PMS or something." Johnny blushed.

"Matthews what the hell are you babbling on about."

"Not quite sure. That's why I know it's a woman thing."

I slugged him in the arm and then let the couch's cusions engulph my body while i waited for Darry to come back from tending to Pony's cuts.


End file.
